Anxiety in my Mind – Silly panic attack

I’m writing this on my iPad because I’m at my parents’ and of course I don’t have my keyboard with me. So let’s see how long my patience lasts when I can’t type properly.

Let’s do this.

I had the silliest panic attack today. Well it didn’t feel silly while I was experiencing it but it was definitely one of those attacks that when they’re over makes you look back and think why on earth was I panicking over THIS?!



Rewind to earlier today when I was about to leave to go visit my parents. I was also meant to go to the gym with my Grandma. 

I was putting on my makeup when I suddenly discovered that the side of my nose was swollen. 

Cue a panic attack.

Yes. Really. I started panicking over a slightly swollen nose. 

Because I had no idea how I got it. 

What is happening? Is my face going to start to swell too? What if I won’t be able to breathe? I don’t want to end up in hospital. 

I didn’t go to the gym. I stayed at home. (Until the evening when I was feeling better and came over at my parents’ place.)

And while I was also aware that I was “just” panicking and these were anxiety thoughts, I needed outside confirmation that I didn’t need to be hospitalized. I was on the phone with my Dad for an hour. And I also took beta blockers. 

I’ve been doing very well recently so now I’m trying not to be too discouraged over this. I tend to mope over things too much.

I need to just view this as a day that anxiety got a bit of a hold over me but shit happens and I move forward. 

Fighting.

PS The swelling started to go away slowly during the day. Most likely it was an internal pimple or an allergic reaction or something. Or I’d accidentally punched myself.

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Fullmetal Alchemist

I had a blank page open (like I often do…) and was about to write a post complaining about anything and everything. Hashtag hormonal rage.

BUT.

Then the second teaser trailer for Fullmetal Alchemist dropped. Fangirl mode: on.